Seriously!

Hi all! Its nice to be back again. With a lot more of experiences of course! But there is this one thing I definitely want to share. Imagine a guy’s picture perfect college life – “Met her in 1^st yr, loved her a lot in 2^nd yr, proposed to her in 3^rd yr and got committed in 4^th yr”. But this one guy I know is almost obsessed with it! So here are the memoirs. (Italicised sentences are what the girls are thinking at that moment.)

It all started around the end of 3rd  yr when one fine day this guy, Rohan, walked up to my friend, Smita, to say hi.

Rohan,”Hi Smita!”

Smita,”Hi…”

Who is this creepy guy and why is he grinning?!

Rohan,”How did you do your test?”

Test?! How did he know we had a test?!

S,”Ahem… OK….”

R,”OK bye!”

Hey wait! Who are you?!

After some Inspector Jacques Clussoue-style investigation, we found out that he was our classmate. Damn! Till that day we didn’t even know he existed! And then it dawned to us that he has been following her for about 2yrs now. Quite literally following and staring. We remembered that he used to follow her even in the bus we travelled. He used to stay at the hostel so it didn't make sense if he went somewhere everyday after college. In fact, once in 2nd year, we had even intercepted and interrogated him. Then we dug out the history. Turns out he first got to know that Smita existed during the end of 1^st yr. And it was love at first sight!

I seriously don’t understand the concept of love at first sight. Neither does Smita. That’s the reason she actually agreed to me using her story for my research! So yes, in the subsequent posts I intend to analyze love at first sight.

But getting back to the topic, it seems he started following her ever since. Again, OK you like the girl. But does that mean following her, like some of those dumb heroes in movies that flopped even during our grandparents time would do because they don’t know to act otherwise; is the only thing to do? I mean forget heroes. Even dogs sometimes chase for no reason. Hell, if you carry some paalak with other vegetables even a goat will follow! So if a goat follows you, you’ll happily marry it?? Dude! Act like a human first!

And then the staring. Most of the time Smita would be thinking Who is this crazy fellow and why is he staring at me?! And what will he do if I stared back?! She tried it one morning. She did not stare. She just looked at him and he turned away. And guess what, we didn’t see him anywhere around that whole day! Chicken!

By this time Smita had found out that Rohan likes her and it was love at first sight. She had no idea why but she wanted to find out. Because she just could not understand how someone could love her with knowing her.

Seeing all this, we kind of felt sorry for him. So we suggested, that dude, forget love etc. Try to be a friend first. And he still has a problem – how do I communicate with her? Seriously, google, facebook, twitter, tagged, Vodafone, airtel, aircel, etc. will sue you simply for asking such a question in this era! So after we suggested this he sends her a friend request on facebook.

But Smita didn’t respond to the request for sometime. And then we noticed that he actually started dressing up like Devdas! Maar daala…. Oh…. Maar daala…. With that perpetually sad face too. Again one day, he walked up to talk to her.

R,”Hi…”

I’ve got to find out why he likes me. This is my chance!

S,”Hi… How are you? ”. She said it with a smile.

He passes her a piece of paper.

R,”This is my mobile number. Feel free to msg me anytime you feel like. Bye!”

He turns 180˚ and walks away.

Hey! I don’t even know you! And why don’t you just tell me directly?!


Smita wanted to ignore that mobile phone number and she tried to do so. But after very little time, he asked her for some help. Genuine help. Something any one else could have helped him with, but you see... in love apparently everyone near the person of interest is in never-never-land or something crap! So he asked her to help him out. Smita did not want to seem too rude or arrogant so she sms-ed him the details he needed. So yes, this was their first sms conversation. After that, he started msg-ing her everyday.

Day 1

R : Hi! :)
S : Hi...
R : Had dinner? :)
S : Yes
R : What did you have? :)
S : Roties and Aalu
R : Nice. What is your favorite colour? :)  
S : Violet
 .
 .
 .


Day 2

R : Hi! :)

S : Hi...

R : Had dinner? :)

Again?!

S : Yes

R : What did you have? :)

S : Dosas

R : Nice. What is your favorite animal? :)  

S : Cat

 .

 .

 .

Day 3

R : Hi! :)

S : Hi...

R : Had dinner? :)

Again?? What the hell?!

S : No

R : Why not? :(

S : Is not ready yet.

R : Oh!:( Anyway what is your favorite movie? :)  

S : Troy

 .

 .

 .

Day 4 

R : Hi! :)

S : Hi...

R : Had dinner? :)

Again?! Seriously what will he say if I said I had a Rat or something?! 

S: I had a Rat.
R : What?!
S : Yes. I had a rat. The tail tastes yummy.
R : Yuk! That's gross! Good bye!
S : Bye R! :)

S: I had a Rat.
R : What?!
S : Yes. I had a rat. The tail tastes yummy.
R : Yuk! That's gross! Good bye!
S : Bye R! :)

Sigh!

Smita : Yes

R : What did you have? :)

Smita : Idlies

 .

 .

 .

This went on for sometime. With these sms-s for reference, Rohan actually claims to know a lot about Smita. And yes, we had a lot of fun laughing on it. But after sometime, it got onto Smita's nerves. More so because we were teasing her.... ;) And so she decided to take revenge. During one such conversation event, she simply asked him why he was talking only to her and did he not think that her friends(including yours truly!), were his friends as well. And I believe he felt compelled to oblige! So that day forth,


Day 1


R: Hi! :)            R: Hi! :)               R: Hi! :)
S: Hi                P: Hi                   Me: Hi
R: Had dinner? :)    R: Had dinner? :)       R: Had dinner?:)
S: Yes               P: Ya                   Me: Yup
R: What dinner? :)   R: What dinner? :)      R: What dinner? :)
       .                    .                       .
       .                    .                       .
       .                    .                       .
Day 2


R: Hi! :)            R: Hi! :)               R: Hi! :)
S: Hi                P: Hi                   Me: Hi
R: Had dinner? :)    R: Had dinner? :)       R: Had dinner?:)
S: Yes               P: No                   Me: Not planning to
R: What dinner? :)   R: Why not? :)          R: Oh why? :)
       .                    .                       .
       .                    .                       .
       .                    .                       .
Day 3


R: Hi! :)            R: Hi! :)               R: Hi! :)
S: Hi                P: Talk                 Me: What?
R: Had dinner? :)    R: Had dinner? :)       R: Had dinner?:)
S: No                                        AAAARRRGGGGHHH!!!!
R: Have it soon :)   R: You there? :)        R: There? :)
       .                    .                       .
       .                    .                       .
       .                    .                       .  

This went on for a while..... And then Rohan did something unbelievable! All that and more in the next post guys....

Ghostly Experience !

In life certain decisions are difficult to make. The very certain nature of uncertainity makes it so difficult. Yet decisions ought to be made. Such a situation occured a few days earlier. Exams were on and 2 subjects were over. The next exam was the next morning. Inspite of preparing for it continuously for like 2 days I was still afraid of the questions I'd be expected to face.


It was dinner time. Though I was supposed to hav dinner and the dinner was right in front of me, the fear of the exam was rejecting every morsel. Anyhow to lose some tension I decided to forget the exam for the time being and think of something else. Not having anything specific I turned to the tube. In many channels, it has recently become a fashion to telecast "Reality shows", the "reality" of which was most probably invented in a four walled meeting room. Nevertheless, these shows are interesting and give a vague picture of the amount of efforts one has to take to write a thriller story. Getting back to my story, one such reality show was being played in which a lady was talking about her personal ghostly experience. Since neither I nor my family believe in the existance of ghosts, we were trying to find logical explaination to her experience.( Someone was trying to play a dirty joke on that lady.! Ghosts are crapshoot anyway.!) After dinner I went straight to my room to hit the books yet again. I generally have the habit of latching my room door when I am studying, mostly to get the college environment. So I again locked myself inside the room and started Communication Theory again.


I started studying again at around 10:30 PM. Time really flies when we dont know what we are doing, why we are doing but are just doing something for the heck of it. And so, in what seemed like 15mins, 1 and a 1/2 hrs had passed. It was time to go sleep. So i went out to the living room, turned on the lights, drank some water, left the lights on and went back into my room to get my bag ready for the next day. Being a creature of habit, I latched my door again. I got everything ready and looked around the room when my eyes feel upon some notes. Just the sight of the notes increased my fear for the exam and I sat back reading the notes.



It would have been 10mins since I started when I heard a sound outside my room's door. I made me shiver for a second but I paid no heed to it and continued with my lesson. After a few minutes I heard a sound similar to that of a light switch being turned off. This really scared me. So much that I considered going to sleep. But for that I'd have to go to the other room for which I'd hav to open the door. I remembered that lady on the TV saying that in her ghostly experience, she almost felt someone's presence right outside the door. I tried it myself. I closed my eyes and tried to listen, to 'feel', but the only things I was able to hear was an odd pegion somewhere, some sleepless dog howling, crickets partying, my fan creaking, and the water dropping from the AC - the air conditioned room that awaits me. I smiled at this but that was all. No feelings.



Then my thoughts drifted,

"Was that lady telling the truth?"

"Nah! She's a liar."

"But what if it was true?"

"Wow that would be something!"

"So whats outside that door?"

"Hmm.... Maybe a vamprie!"

"A vampire? Vampires dont exist!"

"And nor do ghosts and other creepy thing. But come on, its only imagination!"

"Right. So vampire it is. But what is he doing here?"

"I don't intend to be rude.. but DUH !"

"Ok ok... Lets see..."



A man stands on top of a very tall skyscaper,"Hmm... Big city, lots of prey, but where do I find one tonight? Let me fly southwards..." Swoosh!

The bat flies southwards from the syscaper. "Humans do sleep too early. Thank goodness for the street lights. Hey whats that? Lights still ON in that house... Well I guess thats the prey that awaits me!"



The bat peeps in from the window. " Hmm... whats this girl reading at this hour? Its dinner time! But who cares! All I want is for her to not have AB blood group... Leaves me a sour throat... But how do I get in there? I cant change to human form in front of a human, but can't get in there in human form... I should find another window. "


The bat flies around the house."Is this the kitchen window? At least the lights are turned OFF and the windows are open.... So I'm flying iiiiin" SPAT! "Eeeeeeeiiiiiiiiiiii" THUD!
"Darn the transparent windows...."
SWOOSH!
"Aaah! My nose hurts! Whats that? Hey there's a hole... and thats my door...!"
Some man on the road,"Hey who's there? Thirudan thirudan!!! Aye watchman! THIRUDEN!!!"
"Shit!"
SWOOSH!
The bat flies in through the hole.
Watchman,"Appudiya? Enga? Hey who's there??"
Other watchmen,"He was over there! Near that window!", "Someone call the police!", "Where did he go? "
"Where do I hide? Where do I hide? That closet....."
The bell rings.
"That closet it is..!"
Dad,"Who could it be at this hour?"
Mom,"Dunno... Lets see..."
Dad opens the door as I come out of my room.
Me,"Mom, what's going on?"
Watchman,"Saar, it seems a Thief was trying to get into your house!"
Dad,"A thief???"
Watchman,"Aama saar, we heard a 'spat' then a thud', and just after that a man on the road saw someone standing outside your kitchen window!"
Dad,"Lets check out!"
Dad, mom, me and the watchman enter the kitchen.
Dad,"Hmm.. There's no one here.."
Watchman,"Maybe he ran away."
Dad,"Hmm... Maybe.."

"Damn! They store soaps here! Yuk! Hey what are YOU looking at?"
A lizard sitting nearby, "Big Bugsy...!!!"
"BUG?? You think I'm a bug?? Look here Mr. Slimy Lizard, I'm a vampire! I kill humans and drink their bloo..... Hey get away from me!!! MOMMYYYYYY......!!!"
Mom,"What's that sound?"
Dad, "What sound?"
Mom,"I think it is coming from inside that closet. Check it please."
Dad opens the closet door and smiles,"Its just a bat. Maybe it was this bat that made those sounds earlier."
Me,"A bat?!"
Watchman,"Irukkalam saar.."
Mom,"A bat in the house! Its such a bad omen! Catch it and leave it outside please."
"What did she say? Catch 'me'? Hah! They can never do that!"
Me,"Can I touch it once?"
Mom,"Sure, but after that you too will be thrown out. Adukku enna vyadhiyo!"
The watchman catches the bat with a piece of paper.
"Hey let go of me! You don't know who you are dealing with you nincompoops! I'm a vampire!"
Me,"Awww, Its soo cute..."
"Thank you!"
Mom,"I wonder why its squeaking so much... Its definitely sick. Get it out of the house soon please!"
"Oh well FINE! Leave me outside. I'll get back in through that hole."
Dad,"It has stopped moving."
Mom,"Maybe its dead."
Watchman," Aama ma! It looks like it is dead. I'll drop it in the garbage bin."
Saying so the watchman takes the bat outside.
Dad,"You too go sleep now. Its too late and you have to get up early for the exam."
Me,"Ok dad, I'll jus finish the topic I started and then will go to sleep."
I go back into my room and latch the door.

"The GARBAGE BIN?? You know what, you are going to be my prey the moment i get back to my huma.... Hey no! Dont drop me in there you retard!!! Hey no! NOOO!!!"
Watchman to other watchmen,"Was only a bat...."
"Ok at least I landed on something soft and less smelly!"
"GGRRRRRR....."
"What's that? Oh no..! Oh no no no..!! Nice doggy.... Sweet doggy... Go back to sleep doggy...."
SWOOSH!
"YELP!"
"Ah ha! Now you get scared eh!"
Some man round the corner,"Hey guys look! Drunkard in the garbage bin!"
SWOOSH!
Another man round the corner,"Hey where'd he go?"
Yet another man round the corner,"Dunno! Maybe fell back in."

The bat flies into the house through the kitchen window.
SWOOSH!
"Tap Tap ... Tap Tap...", someone was knocking on my door. Thinking its dad, I open the door only to find some man standing there. He takes a step forward and I run and hide behind my table,"Who are you??"
"Me? Ha ha ha.. I've been trying to tell that to everyone I met tonight. But no one listens!"
The mans starts pacing around the room as he spoke, "I am a vampire. My name is Dracul and I'm a count. Being a vampire I drink human bloo.... WTF!!! What are you doing here??? This is not right!!! She is my prey!!!... At least you should have told me you'd be here!!!... Oh ya you dont talk!.... Ok ya! I should have guessed! But come on! Who doesn't want an easy prey??... You have no idea what I had to go through to get her!!!... (The man jumps up and down with every word) Its-still-not-fair!!! She-was-my-prey!!!... "
I am totally bewildered.
"Hey drinking blood is what we do!! Can't you once give up your supper for a brother???... So what??... OK FINE!!! But remember you owe me 1! Next time I get the prey and you back off!!!"
Thus the man screams at my open Communication Theory book, completely ignores my presence, and stomps out of the room mumbling!